Love, Laundry, and the Will to Keep Going

If you really want to make Kara’s day, all you have to do is clean your house and do your laundry. I’m not kidding. Nothing makes her happier than knowing you’re getting your housework done. During her last visit to the Chamber office, literally while throwing up, all she wanted to know from Marcy was whether she got her house cleaned over the weekend.

On the daily, she hounds all of us to stay on task and reminds us what needs to be added to the grocery list. It can be pretty excessive, but lately, her commands are very much needed, especially on days when depression tries to win. So I’ve been listening to Kara and trying not to neglect the house in the midst of chaos. Thank God for Roger, who’s been keeping the place cleaner than I ever have.

Kara’s been doing great. She’s moving better than she has in months and her energy is back up. In fact, she’s staying up late these days. Now that college basketball is over, she’s gotten hooked on watching reruns of Cops. Dad has night duty and stays up until she’s ready for bed. She’s discovered Reels on Facebook and fills her time scrolling until she finds Extreme Home Makeover or Super Nanny clips. She’s also asked to watch Yankees games, and of course she isn’t missing the Masters this weekend. She gets particularly excited about short putts that are missed.

On Saturday, she sat at the kitchen island for the first time in months. It felt like a return to normal as she oversaw the steps of homemade potato salad and watched Mom make baby back ribs.

If you looked at her now, you’d never guess she’s sick. We went back to the oncologist last week to revisit her treatment plan. During her exam, the doctor said he believes the treatment is working—he couldn’t feel any masses in her breast or lymph nodes. I want to feel joy at those words, but I’m still reluctant to trust good news. That’s something I’m working on with God, trying to believe in blessings, healing, and protection.

She’ll get bloodwork on Monday, and treatment is scheduled for Tuesday. We’ve adjusted the schedule a bit—she’ll get the Day 1 dose (Keytruda, Gemzar, and Carboplatin), and then we’ll have two full weeks off to recover before the next round. I'm hopeful and grateful that extra time off will be a gift.

And maybe there are people wondering why we’re trying another round after everything we’ve been through. We don’t owe anyone an explanation, but I did start this blog to share the journey. So it’s worth noting that her last hospitalization was due to a severe reaction to an anti-nausea med (Compazine, which she’ll never be given again), and her first treatment cycle came with terrible nausea we didn’t manage aggressively enough. We’re not expecting it to be easy, but we’ve learned a lot and this time, we’re better prepared.

We’re still nervous. We’re still unsure what the “right” choice is. But we also don’t want to look back and wonder if we could have done more to give her a longer and fuller life.

This past week I posted a sweet video of Kara showing off items signed by THE Kate Martin (thank you again to Susie Cunningham for the incredible gift). Seriously everyone's generosity has truly overwhelmed us in the best way and frankly restored my faith in humanity. From meals to prayers to kind messages, we feel incredibly supported.

I’ve been reluctant to start a donation campaign because we’re not in dire need. Kara’s medical bills are covered by Dad’s railroad pension and Iowa Medicaid-thanks be to God. And since Kara receives SSI, she can’t receive direct donations. Still, many have asked how they can help support her journey and offered to start donation pages.

So I’ve created a support fund that will be managed by me. It's not for medical bills, but for respite care and comfort-related expenses. Kara’s care is incredibly hands-on. Because of her disability, she can’t fully communicate how she’s feeling, which means we’re managing every part of her daily care. Donations will help cover the cost of caretaking (supporting lost wages from my time off work and purchasing comfort items). It gives our family the flexibility and capacity to continue showing up for Kara in the way she deserves. There’s absolutely no pressure or expectation to give, your presence on this journey with us is already more than enough. Here’s the link: https://givebutter.com/teamkara

Wish us luck this go-around. This is a big week in her journey, and your continued prayers and love mean everything. 💛

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If You're New Here

Hi, I’m Alisha, Kara’s sister and biggest advocate. Kara was diagnosed with Stage 4 Triple-Negative Invasive Ductal Carcinoma (TNBC) in December 2024. Her cancer has spread to her bones, liver, and other areas, making this an incredibly difficult and uncertain journey.

Despite it all, Kara’s light still shines so brightly—she’s full of love, giggles, and endless positivity. This blog is where I share updates on her fight, the highs and lows, and the incredible community rallying around her.

Thank you for being here, for your love, support, and prayers. We need them more than ever. 💛 And of course, Go Hawks!

Team Kara Support Fund

Your gift helps cover travel, caregiving, and comfort-related expenses for Kara’s support team. While Kara cannot receive funds directly, your generosity provides the relief and resources we need to keep showing up with love.

https://givebutter.com/teamkara